I Guess I'm Staying

2024-05-29 “I Guess I'm Staying”  Jenn

One year ago today, I woke up in 2023. I think I'm finally ready to face the fact that I will never be going back.

I was born on July 15, 1970. Yeah, I know I don't look that old. Keep reading…

I was born in a small town in western Canada…oldest child of 3…lower-middle class. You get the picture.

I was loved but life was a little tough. My father was a workaholic. My mother had issues and a lot of responsibilities to her younger siblings.

My childhood was pretty good, overall with a few really bright spots. When I was 9, I won a colouring contest in Canada's largest newspaper and got to travel to the big city with my family to claim the price and watch a live musical staring David Cassidy.

I scored in the top 5% of every grade from kindergarten to grade 13. I was able to get around well in all the different school groups, but I guess you'd say my friends were the odd balls. And I guess you wouldn't call them that in 2024.

Which brings me to the shift.

Double meaning forthcoming.

It started in April 29, 1997… and ended a year ago on April 29, 2023. But it took only a few seconds to happen.

I remember picking the pieces of asphalt from my face and hair.

Reaching for my car keys and bag, I thought maybe I had been mugged, but everything was there. I made my way to the curb, sat my ass down and squinted through the darkness at the empty parking lot.

It wasn't until my third or fourth drag off my cigarette, that I realized I knew where I was, but didn't recognize anything around me.

I started to retrace what had happened over the past few hours.

Just recently promoted to Assistant Manager at Block Buster, I spent most of my shift obsessively calculating how long it would take me to pay off my student loans with my new raise.

When 11:00 p.m. hit, I closed up, armed the alarm, and made my way out to the parking lot. The fog was heavy for April and as I walked over the pot-holes and slurpie cups, I heard a meow.

Looking down, I saw an orange and black tabby stray. Fearless, she sauntered over and started rubbing against my legs. Her fur stuck to the cheap, black cotton, and I remember thinking ho much I didn't have time for unnecessary laundry.

As I bent over to pet her, I felt like a 100 pound weight was pushing me over onto the pavement. Despite my best effort, there was no scream and no fight forthcoming..

I was helpless and the last thing I saw from under my hair was a flash of white light so bright, I thought I was dying.

As I stamped out my cigarette, I noticed the asphalt beneath me was smooth and dark. There were flowers and shrubs in the medians, and the Block Buster sign was replaced with one that said Subway.

I reached into my bag for my car keys and pulled out a black plastic fob with lock and unlock icons etched onto buttons. I pressed the unlock and felt my stomach turn when a car beeped and flashed its lights off to my right.

Turning slowly in circles, i walked to the vehicle and opned the door. It was clean and modern and maybe even a little Jetsons-looking.

After checking the backseat, I got in and locked the door. I found the interior ligh and after a few tries, managed to open the glove box.

Hands shaking, I pulled out the manual… "2024 Volkswagon Jetta."

All I could focus on was taking one breath after another as I started the car and began my route home.

I didn't know where else to go. I was lost. Like no one had ever been lost before!

So, over the last year, I have avoided the reality that I am in 2024. I've hoped to wake up from a dream. I've hoped to fall on my face again and go back to where I belong.

Now… Well, I guess I'm staying…